Originally Published on the Gottman Institute Blog
Have you ever thought about the Relationship Thermostat?
The secret to keeping things comfortable is to address the uncomfortable issues that pull you two apart.
Longitudinal research on newlywed couples discovered that stable and happy couples are more responsive to slight changes in negativity than ailing marriages.
It’s like every relationship has a connection thermostat that signals how well the relationship is doing. Ideally, you want to find that balance between hot and cold so you can feel secure, connected, and cherished.
The problem is, like a house, the thermostat is bound to change from time-to-time based on what happens on the outside. Every relationship is going to feel hot or cold.
The more sensitive you are to the emotional temperature changes and work together to return to the comfort zone of connection, the better…